Orders!

So, we finally have orders to leave Korea! Yay!! Monday was such a horrible day. Learning that we could possibly have orders that day seemed to prove very stressful for me. All of a sudden, it was real. I mean, Saturday it hit me that we are leaving in just a few weeks. There are a few major things that are going to be happening.. we will be having out last date night with our very dear friends, I have one last MOPS, we will be having out stuff shipped back to the states, we'll be moving out and cleaning our apartment, we'll be going into lodging, and then making our way to the airport. There's a few more things inbetween there, but that's about it. :) I do have to say that my anxiety from Monday has subsided. Maybe I finally took my advice and realized that God has it all worked out. I was so at peace coming here and yet so uneasy about going back. Maybe because, which you'd think I'd learn by now, that what my plans are, aren't always what God's plans are. :) Not being blasphemous, but in a way, the Army reminds me of God. Just stick with me a sec. We as individuals make plans for weeks, months, years, or days in advanced only to have the Army say, Nope, not happening. I have something else planned for you. And in the same way, I have learned through the Army, in a sense, that my plans and God's plans aren't always the same. :) I may think that things are going to go the way I want them, but they hardly ever go as 'planned'. And in a humorous way (just because of my own personal sense of humor), God's plans always come out better than mine. Isn't that how it always is though. Like with coming over here.. I wrote earlier that I thought that there were going to be these huge plans for me here with reaching out to people and God using me to help others and on and on. Then through being here, I learned that God had bigger plans for me with my kids and changing me as a mother and a wife. Being that witness to my kids and teaching them in the way of the Lord, that was way bigger than the plans I thought he had for me. :) So maybe I finally took the advice that I often give to other people.. To rest in the Lord.

Munchkin

So. Amongst all the mess of moving and sorting and AHHH.. I've almost forgotten that our baby girl Munchkin is going to be 5!!! I can't believe it! She is so smart and so funny and has such a great sense of humor. She is very helpful and mostly doesn't complain about doing what she is told. ;) I remember the day we found out we were pregnant. Hunny was out mowing the lawn while I was trying to figure out how to read the test! (I took 3 just to be safe) I came running outside and waved him to come in. "Look!" He of course knew before I even did. Apparently I don't pay that much attention to my body and my moods and whatnot and he does. He's always been good about that sort of thing. :) So through the next 8 months, I tried to prepare for what I thought I was going to be a natural at. April 29th. That was my due date. Of course you hear the stories that babies come early, so when 7 months came and I started having contractions, I immediatly thought, "This is it!" And of course, no luck with being early. So, April 29th, I had a doctor appointment. "Well, let's check and see where you're at!" said the doctor. "YOUCH!!! What are you doing!?!" I cried. No one prepared me for that! "Well, you're going to have a baby today!" So we went back home, ate lunch, rested a bit, and headed back into the hospital. We were ready! We were ready to have this little girl natural! Oh dear. So I tried the breathing. I tried to take a shower. I threw up. I just missed Hunny. Woops! Sorry dear! "Clean up on aisle 3!" Ok, that was it.. give me a shot of narcotics. Yes, apparently narcotics are legal in a hospital. Anyway. I guess my eyes rolled back into my head and I finally got some rest. No one told me it'd be this hard! So, after that wore off, I just couldn't take the pain, so I caved in and got a walking epidural. My sweet hunny whispered before we made the decision, "Are you sure. I know you wanted to go natural and I wouldn't want you to be disappointed in yourself for not." He is so sweet. :) BUT GIVE ME THE EPIDURAL! :) (I love you babe) So, at 7pm the doc came in a checked me. 7cm. Yay! Ok, now you can have the epidural. So the nurse comes in at 7:30pm. I have horrible veins.. so she can't find it. "Can you hold still?" And not in a nice tone at all. I mean really? I am laying on my side with my arm behind me trying to control breath through these contractions and you're asking me to be still!! Finally she got it in. Then came in the wonderful man with the epidural. With a walking epidural, I could still feel the pressure, just not the pain. So, the doc came in at 8pm and said, you are 8cm. You should be having this baby very soon. Let me know when you feel you need to push." 8:45.. Uh Hunny, I think you need to get the doctor! My doctor was so amazing! She was a mid-wife doctor and was so gentle and so kind and walked me through the whole process. She was amazing! She came in at 9pm and 3 pushes later, 9:21pm, I was holding our sweet baby girl! She was so precious and so beautiful! I was able to spend the first hour holding her a nursing her. Cuddling her and talking to her. Hunny stayed with her every step of the way to get cleaned, checked, and tested. I couldn't believe that this little person came out of me! I don't think it really hit me and that I really fully bonded with her until she was a week old. And, to this day, I feel really guilty about that. Not as though I could help it. That first week, was like taking care of a real doll, except, I couldn't just leave her in my pile of toys for a few days and play with her later. :) I still remember her sweet smell. I still remember her throwing up on me all the time and taking showers 3 times a day sometimes. I still remember those late night feedings and those 3 hours cries from gas. Oh what I wouldn't do to have one more moment with her 5 years ago. Not as though I am not enjoying her now of course. But thinking back and what I'd do different and taking more time to snuggle and cuddle and play. Makes me sad to think of how big she has already gotten. My sweet sweet baby girl. I love snuggling with her and talking with her and singing with her and laughing with her. She truely has been a huge huge blessing! It's funny to look back and remember that I thought I knew all there was to being a parent. I mean, I had nieces and nephews and worked in the nursery at church and and.. :) No one prepared me for the joys and heartbreaks of being a mommy. The joys of watching them learn and grow and the heartbreaks of watching them grow. :( I am so thankful that God has blessed me with my kids. I remember thinking 6 years ago that I'd never be a mom. I have endometreosis and was never really explained how severe it was. The longing and desire of being a mom and it might not happen! What a blessing and a joy it's been these last 5 years to watch our children grow from inside my belly to baby to toddler to preschooler. Sniff.. sniff. We always joke that we'll put bricks on their heads to keep them from growing up! Or that they can't grow! They have to stop! Then they say, "But I want to get big like you! Jesus will help me to grow and you can't stop Him!" Oh I love our kids!

Almost there!

We have orders! Sort of.. Hopefully we should get orders later today. Well with that.. I apparently am not handling stress very well today. I woke up this morning, ate breakfast, took a shower, checked FB, etc. I get a phone call from my neighbor's son because he wanted to say hello. He is so adorable and hilarious! Cracks me up. Then I was asked to make 2 birthday cakes for this Saturday! I am so excited! Then shortly after, I get a call from my Hunny saying our orders should be in today for Ft Drum! Yay! That mean that it's getting closer! We bought tickets from Colorado to Wisconsin over the weekend and now Hunny has to go to travel and set up a day and time for the movers to come get our household goods. Wow! We have to start sorting through all of our papers, clothes, misc stuff to see what is going to make the cut to bring back to the states. Now we're trying to see about getting a space A flight back to the states. I feel like the stress is elevating! To top it off, I'm putting pics on FB because everyone is so interested and demanding photos like I'm this super important person.. ;) jk. So I'm putting up pictures and I hear, "Mom! Oh NO! Buddy spilled his milk! Ahh It's going to get me! Here it comes!" "Get a paper towel and clean it up!" (me) (very calmly, I might add) Then I hear, "Oh no! Sweet Pea spilled her milk too!!" Followed by cries, because spilled milk is definitely something that needs to be cried about. "Again, get a paper towel and clean it up!" Now getting a little more irritated because apparently no one is listening to me about cleaning up. I walk in to find that there is an enormous paper towel pile that has little of the enormous milk spill on it. "Clean up the mess on the floor and on the table. Stop goofing around!" Voice is elevated. Went back to loading these super important pictures. Munchkin comes in, "Mom! Sweet Pea and Buddy are playing with the paper towel!" Now this paper towel roll was completely full and she came in with an empty roll. "Sweet Pea and Buddy!!!" I come out to find a nice 'red carpet effect' of paper towel unrolled on the floor and Buddy running across it. I quickly correct him and put him in time out. Sweet Pea was cleaning dutifully. Good job. It was too late though. By this time, I was yelling at Buddy because if they weren't playing while eating, they would have not spilled, which would not have lead to an entire roll of paper towel on the floor. After I was finished helping clean up the floor and table and I seemed to have calmed down, Munchkin starts singing...

"If you're happy and you know it, clap you hands
If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands, 
If you're happy and you know it, then your face will surely show it
If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands."

All I could do was laugh. I know, it's just spilled milk and just a roll of paper towel. And I know that the kids didn't deserve to be yelled at. I guess the stress of leaving is effecting me more than I know. Time to spend some more time in prayer and in the Word and in song. I firmly believe that God speaks to me through 2 things.. through his beautiful creation and through song. I tell ya, through the sweet voice of my Munchkin, He spoke to me.

Friends

Yes, according to my sister, I have been slacking on blogging. So.. here I sit writing, to the popular demands of my one reader. hahahah :) Today I looked at the calender.."24 more days!" My stomach is churning and the nerves are starting to set in. I'm not worried about the flight or any of that. I'm not really worried at all. I am just already missing friends that I know I won't either ever see again or that I won't see for a very long time. It's the one time, well of many times, I don't like the military. Sure, I love the adventure of new places and new people, but with that, comes friendships that one day, I'll have to say goodbye. I don't really think of that when making these friendships. My first thought is, Yay! Finally! A friend! :) Because it only took me a year after being here to really make a friend. Sheesh. I know that God will provide more friends at Ft Drum, but it's the saying goodbye that is really starting to cause my apparent stomach problems. I also know kind of what to expect when we get back to the states, and I'm a little scared of the thought of being back in the US. Weird, I know. In a way, I suppose I wish things were normal so to speak. You know, the same friends, the same church, the same school for the kids, the same stores, the same everything. Oh wait, I've had that my whole growing up life and somehow I wasn't content with that. And now I'm not content with always having to say goodbye. I guess I just need to get over it.

Oh Be Careful Little Eyes..

Oh be careful little eyes what you see

Oh be careful little eyes what you,

For the Father up above is looking down with love

So be careful little eyes what you see.

Oh be careful little ears what you hear

Oh be careful little ears what you hear,

For the Father up above is looking down with love

So be careful little ears what you hear.

Oh be careful little mouth what you say

Oh be careful little mouth what you say,

For the Father up above is looking down with love

So be careful little mouth what you say.

 This morning I was woken up by Sweet Pea's sweet little voice.. "Mom, can you pull Ken's pants up! Ew! That's gross!" How innocent are their minds. This song came roaring into my thoughts this morning as Sweet Pea sat there patiently waiting for me to help her. And I began to think, how often do we try to protect our children's minds from the world around us only to watch or listen to it in private? How often do we sit and talk about our husbands, children, family, friends, only to walk away from that conversation with a horrible attitude about that person. Your point of view on that person or people you were talking about has been changed.  You hear negative things about your friend's husband and you being to think.. "Does my husband do that? I think so!" You don't look at your spouse as that Knight and Shining Armor anymore. You see him as a man, sometimes a boy even, who sits and does absolutely nothing around the house, never helps you, blah, blah, blah. There have been many times I will get upset and start thinking of all the negative things toward my Hunny. When I go to talk it out with him, he'll be like, "What? I'm not helping? I've been doing some dishes, cleaning up after dinner, getting the kids ready for bed.." and can rattle off a whole long list of things he's been doing. Apparently gone unnoticed or unappreciated by me. "but, but.." But what really? I hear about negative things of other spouses from other people or just anything negative in general, and begin to view that person or that thing in such a horrible light. Being here in South Korea, the post we are at isn't the greatest, but it does the job really. The post has come a long way from where it was just 10 years ago. For about 6 months, I had the worst attitude here. Women from church even were always finding something wrong with the post and the wait at the clinic is too long and we have such a small px and commissary. The other day, I was in the commissary and there was a gentleman there complaining to a worker, who has no control of what gets ordered, that there wasn't enough of something ordered. Now this man wasn't just complaining, his voice was getting louder and you could tell the worker was getting uncomfortable. "if you have 5 of something and 15 people want to buy it, you should order more! The other base has this!" Well, to be honest, go to the other base! Anyway, my point is, the more negative things you hear, the more you are going to talk negative about that person or thing. Which also means, the more negatives you personally say, the more you begin to think it, the more you think it, the more discontent you will be. I was challenged last night by Pastor James MacDonald as I was listening to my iPod while working out, to renew my mind in His Word. In God's word. I find that surrounding myself with positive Christians, my mind isn't focused on all the petty stuff. I am thankful to be able to be here with my Hunny and our kids. I am thankful that there is a facility on post where I am able to buy food for my family. I am thankful that God has provided all of our needs. So be careful what you listen to, watch, and say. The song up above is a great reminder of that. Think of something positive to say about another person you don't really like or find something positive that your spouse is doing. It's easy to get caught up in complaining or watching that movie or hearing that joke or doing that thing you know you shouldn't be doing. Whatever it is, keep your eyes on Jesus. Keep your mind in His Word and protect your own eyes, ears, and mouth. It's easy to watch something, but it's harder to get that image out of your mind. Ask yourself, is this really glorifying to God? With anything. It's something that I've been challenged with over the last few years. It's not easy, hence the word challenge. :) Oh to be innocent as a child again. Yep, I was sheltered at a child to a certain extent. My dad would record movies off the tv with his VCR (rock 90s!) so that we could still watch movies without the swear words, the nonviolent movies that is. I am so thankful for that. Wish I was 6 again. :)

What a Day!

Yesterday a group of girls and I had a day out! Yay! So, this is how our day went.. We decided to meet on poast at 7:30am and get Starbucks before we left.. because well, that is early. So, 7:45, we finally all meet at Starbucks. We walk up to the door only to see no lights on and read a paper sign on the door that said, "Closed due to shortage of water. Will reopen at 1pm." Huh? Well that's new. Oh bummer. Well, let's pick up one more girl and head off to the train station.. they have a Starbucks!! So, a little out of the way, but that's ok, it's coffee. We get to the train station only to remember, "Oh yeah, stores in Korea don't open til 10am." Although, what was that? A ray of hope! Dunkin Donuts! So a few donuts later, coffee, juices, and water later.. we were off!

So after a 45 minute drive, not too bad of traffic, we find our exit. Hey! Let's get in that lane! I think that says market! Woops! It did say market.. Grain Market. Well, I'm sure we'd see flour, but not the right kind of flower. Woops.. well, we're in the far left turning lane with no hope of making it to the going straight lane. Well, we turn. And we go down and down and down and turn. Whew! What a line! Along our way of friend drivin.. we saw, what I thought was kind of funny, Fish for Sale! So, traffic was crazy trying to inch our way through all these cars!

With lots of turns and turn arounds and Wait, which was do we turn? We finally arrived at the flower market. But wait.. that doesn't look right! This is the Whole Sale Flower Market! Oh Well. The flowers were still amazing! I was so taken back with such beautiful flowers, trees, and pottery! God is so good!!

Yes, God's work is absolutely stunning!

After we were finished at the flower market, we were on our way to Yongson Amy Post.

This is a gianormous post for Korea for the time being and is always a treat to be able to go up there. That had been my 3rd time I believe being up there. So we headed to the food court and had, of course, food from an asia style restaruant. In Korea, with the option of American food on post, and we eat Asian. Funny. After we got done eating, we headed over to the PX to browse around. With my waist line strinking, I thought I'd look for a belt. I've invested in some cheap jeans that apparently keep falling off. :) Woah! 28 dollars! Yikes! Guess I won't be getting one just yet. Then after a stroll around the px, we were off for a walk to the subway station to head to Dongsaemun!

Ah the walking began! The flowers on the way over were beautiful! So, off we go.. we are at Line 6 to Dongdaemun.. err skreech, hault, stop! Wait, but aren't we supposed to be on Line 4? Hm.. After a little confusion, we asked a Korean girl who seemed to be with an American. "Excuse me, could you tell us how to get to Dongdaemun?" She looks it up on her phone. In the mean time, the guy, "So, are you guys American?" Really? I mean, Really? "Yes we are". "So you guys are with the military then?" "Yep". (Me, because from the sound of it, it didn't sound or look like he was here with the military) "So are you with the military or just here for fun?"  "With the Army". Yep, that was a g conversation. Oh! She's done on her phone. We were to get on a connecting subway train. "Thank you!" And off we went. We get to the connecting stop and were again greeted by the same girl. "Follow me!" The connecting train was upstairs. That was weird. Anyway, We find out train and off we go! All crammed in! Nice! Whew! We made it! Yay! So, we pop up on the street on stair #6. Hey look!

There's the Gate! It's so awesome! So huge! Oh wait.. where's the buildings we need to go to? Hmm.. on the other side of the street with no cross walk. Hmm..  under the street to the subway. Let's try it again. Oh No! We can't get to where we need to be without a ticket! 1500won later! Yay! A ticket! Through the gates, to where we need to be, through the end gates! Yay! We made it! oh wait, weren't we just here? Let's try Stairs #1. Pop up! Hey it's the gate again! (different view this time). Wait.. where's the buildings? Eventually we found our way to the other side! Crazy Americans! :) 

So we were finally here! For all our fabric, button, ribbon, hair clip needs! How fantastic! All the little knickknacks to put on hair clips and all the ribbons and buttons and beads and wire and wow! It was 1 full floor of all of this! The other 4 floors consisted of fabric for clothes, uppalstering(sp), and drapes! Wow! I was able to get a ton of hair accessories for hair bows and lots of basic color ribbon for super cheap! Besides it being SUPER hot in there, I was able to find what I needed. Yay!

So, now that our wallets are empty and our bags are full, homeward bound we go. We get back on the subway and what do we smell at the connecting station? Nothing other than Deli Manjoo! I didn't get s picture of that. Fail, I know. :) We race one way up the stairs only find that the smell has gotten weaker. Wrong way. Turn around and went the other way! Success! They are these small cake like things shaped like corn on the cob. Yeah, who knows. Then in the middle, there is a custard like substance! Very yummy and delcious! That was my first time eating them and I have to say, they were good. So after I filled up on 12 (don't judge me, all that walking, I had to have been ok), we boarded the subway only to finally know what it feels like to be a sardine.

Pushing to get on, pushing to get off. It's a mad house! You know that it's full when the train moves, you don't fall over. :) We finally made it to the subway station by post. Yay! Another victorious shopping trip! And just incase the North invades, the first 20 people to get the masks at the train station will be safe. Whew! That makes me feel better! All in all, it was a fantabulous day out with the girls! We had lots of laughs, lots of great conversation, and made such great memories! Korea! I will miss you! Friends, family in Korea, I will miss you all dearly! Oh, we made it home safe and sound with no complications thanks to one of the husbands. :) Yay! And we made it home in record time too! :) Thank you ladies!! 

33 days and counting!

So, here we go again.. 33 more days left here in Korea and not a thing is packed! :) Oh that's right, the military will pack and move us. Check! Our first stop is Colorado. We are SO much looking forward to spending some time in the mountains. Soaking in God's beauty. We had lived there.. one of the many 12+ moves we made.. and every morning and evening, being able to watch the beauty of the mountains. I firmly believe that God speaks to me through nature and music. Seeing those mountains gives me goose bumps and makes my nose tingle.. which happens when I am going to tear up. :) With all the moves, I am so grateful that God has been able to share his beautiful creation with me. I have barely seen anything, but what I have seen has amazed me. I remember first coming to Korea. We landed when the sun was setting. We decided that taking a cab would be best instead of riding the bus for 2 plus hours. Anyway, on our way over this long brigde, I can remember the sky was purple, pink, blue, and some yellow. The mountains were raised high in the water with what looked like clouds all around the tops. I wish I had my camera. It was absolutely breath taking. I remember thinking, "God is so awesome!" So, then we got to our apartment. Almost 300 dollars later!!!!! AHHH!!! Yes, next time we'll be taking the bus. Funny how those 2 memories collide! :) So, we're on our umpteenth move and I couldn't be more excited. There's so many thing I am looking forward to doing! I'm looking forward to that 'stability'. The kids will be in school soon, I'll be going back to school soon, Hunny will be going back to school again. There's so many other things I am looking forward to. There are also a few things I am not looking forward to. I am not looking forward to leaving one of my best friends here. For the first almost year that we were here, I had a few acquaintance friends, but nothing real solid. And when I did make a friend, they moved back to the states shortly after. :( I love my friend. She's been a huge blessing to me here and things would not have been the same without her. Coffee runs, workouts at the gym, friend therapy, shopping trips, girl talk, and just plain being like family to me. I'm also going to miss MOPS, which, was a huge life line here for me. The atmosphere is tremendous. So welcoming and inviting. I ancourage any and all moms to get involved in their local MOPS group. To be in a room with women who are either going through the same things you are as a mom or have already gone through those years, is so uplifting! Some have the same struggles and the same successes! I will definitely miss my MOPS group. I will also miss Happy Quilt, Dongdaemun, and the flower market.. which interstingly enough.. I am going with a group of ladies tomorrow.. :) Yay Girl time! Anyway. So, very excited to see family, but very sad to be leaving my family here. And of course, the stores. :)